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There is so much to unpack here, the one thing that stuck out is this…
“Which is another lesson I’ve learned. People will act better if you make them feel better – not worse.”
I am a FIRM believer in this…just simply saying “GOOD MORNING” to people as you pass them changes the way they view the day/moment. Every other day I run in a park near my house. I’ve been doing this for years. Everyone I pass I say “Good Morning and wave.” now I don’t have conversations with these people – I’m too busy making myself do something I inherently hate – but every so often I go for a walk down there with my wife…and when I see those people, it’s like we’re long lost friends.
There’s a real sense of community. Now, are these people my friends? No, of course not – but, maybe, just maybe for a brief moment they will treat someone in their life a little better.
My reason for living – is to leave the place better than you found it. I hope, through what I do, I help someone deal with something extremely stressful. I have kids…and they’re already better people than I am. So, regardless of whatever $$$ comes in and goes out… leaving this place a small degree better than you found it…that’s success. Are people better for knowing you? Look, not everybody deserves kindness, there is evil and it needs to be destroyed.
Look, I was fortunate to be born into a loving and supportive family in a nice area. It wasn’t perfect, nothing is…but there are many others who or just dealt a pile of shit. And because I think human nature is basically good (if it wasn’t society wouldn’t exist) if you treat them with respect and kindness…it gets reciprocated.
The Netflix series “Unlocked” makes an interesting case for this. Because of understaffing, inmates were locked in their cells 23 out of 24 hours of the day. Then the warden decided to unlock the cells 24-7 and let the inmates behavior dictate if the cells stayed open or not. It was an interesting result.