How to spot a Sanctimonious Martial Artist

[Anonymous]

How to spot a Sanctimonious Martial Artist.

Martial arts instructors, like most “authorities” in any field like to hear the sound of their own voice which is usually filled with BS, unless of course it/s me then you’re fine because I’m right and they’re wrong.

Martial arts as an institution needs to be nuked. It is loaded with substandard teachers who are so full of themselves, that they don’t even realize how moronic they sound.

The following is a guide so you can read through the huge pile of cow poop their pushing to reveal them for who they really are:
scared candy-asses in patch covered pajamas.

1. You must remain calm during an attack.
This is one of the most idiotic and ill conceived notions I’ve ever hear. Sure, I go into deep breathing exercises right when some steroid induced maniac is about to slam my head against a delivery van. Unless you’re being attacked by a third grader, your body is going to dump o much adrenalin in your system that you may literally crap your pants.

2. Trapping
This is fine example of the martial artist making things more complicated than they need to be. Let’s call trapping what is really is: grabbing.
You don’t need to make a range and create a whole system for a technique that is instinctive. The first thing a baby can do (beside dirty diapers, eat and cry) is GRAB. Do not be fooled, you don’t need Grand Master Schwartz to teach you how to grab.

3. Use his force against him.
You have to hand it to the marketing, it sounds a whole lot better than get out of the way. If you ever played any sport you know this concept.
If you’re not stronger and in a whole lot better shape, you better use leverage and speed to get around or over him. Which brings me to my next point.

4. Use your strength against his weakness.
No kidding, I though I would just go ahead and try to pick up that 300 pound guy. Stop trying to sound like Confucius and show me where and how to hit, stomp, bite, gouge stab and shoot.

5. Don’t use a weapon, he will take it way from you and use it against you.
Yes, if you hand it to him. This statement defies all logic. Weapons were invented to make killing or beating another human being, animal, or mother-in-law more efficient. Good weapons work because they are simple in purpose and function Knife: hold one end, thrust pointy end in rapist. Gun: hold handle, point at rapists and pull trigger. (sure there’s a little more to it, but you get the point).
Unless you are completely inept or have been trained by someone who is, you want a weapon and you will use whatever you can get your bloody little hands on to beat and bludgeon the attacker. Don’t bother spending the few hours to know how to use a weapon properly, spend 10 years with me, so you can get killed trying something completely useless!

6. Develop your Chi (Ki, life force or what ever the latest new age term is)
Let’s make this simple CHI = ADRENALINE any questions? When some Crouching Tiger, Hidden DB starts spouting off about life force and having awesome CHI, hide your check book.

7. Always be ready, never let anything surprise you.
This is a MYTH and another tactics to keep you training for years and years to come. But according the the Department of Learning Resources from the University of Pennsylvania it’s not long and actually comes in waves of 30 second to 1 minute bursts. Then feelings and emotions come into play and then you refocus.
If you are focused on an “ACT” you can concentrate a lot longer on the action you are doing. Which brings me to the next point.

8. Your mind must be blank.
First off, other than a women I dated, the human mind is NEVER blank. It is always working on something. When the Japanese Samurai talked about MUSHIN or NO MIND. It was meant for during the cut or during the action.
They were right, but that doesn’t mean you don’t do it already. Batting requires you to only think of your swing. Playing Basket ball, Boxing, Wrestling ANY action for that matter. The point is: Concentrate on what the hell you’re doing and don’t be distracted.

9. Control the fight.
How about survive the fight. This idea of controlling someone who is desperately trying to bash your skull in gets more martial artists beat up than dressing like Bruce Lee.
If you want to spar, if you want to compete- sure, by all means, set the tempo and control the fight. In self defense…survive the fight, defeat your enemy and leave.

10. Make the best use of your energy.
As opposed to make the worst use of your energy? Do they think you’re a moron? No, I thought I would do 50 push ups and then fight him.

11. Every martial art has something to offer.
Of course they say this because like a house of cards. Deep down, these guys KNOW they are full of shit. So that’s why they CAN’T say anything because they know that if they do, they run the risk of being exposed as con-artists.
Why do you think that Brazilian Juijuitsu became so popular? (I still don’t know or care how they spell it, its Jujustu- why because Donn Draeger spelled it that way).

Because it exposed martial arts for what they were: over inflated and misapplied and down right useless. Karate had went from killing art to kiddie past time. Tae kwon do is Korean foot fighting, not a deadly form of self defense. Kick boxing, Sumo and all the others in the first few UFC were MISAPPLIED to the octagon.

But you’re too stupid to notice this. What do you think would happen to Gracie in a boxing match? He would get killed. A mixed martial artist only has so much time to train he can’t become a better boxer than a boxer, he can’t become a better grappler than a wrestler, BJJ or Judo fighter. You only have so many hours in the day.

It didn’t matter, every dojo in the world decided they would, buy a video, attend a seminar and add a grappling class. Wow, a few hours a week grappling. Just enough to make you awful.

If I start spewing off on how the SDTS could win inder the rules of the octagon please shoot me and put me out of my misery.

BJJ became popular for a brief time because martial artists have no confidence in what they do and don’t know the purpose behind why they are doing it.

So instead of looking at what their martial art REALLY is they continue to add more stuff so they can suck at more things rather than be good at one thing. (that’s another article, maybe I got off track, so be it. Back to the original thought…).

Don’t fall for the hype. They can SAY anything they want, but actions speak louder than words. If you start hearing these ideas and phrases put on your boots because the horse apples are going to pile high.

[Damian (Instructor)]

Lol. Damian is so original! I love it. “I’m right and they’re wrong!” lol.

[Damian (Instructor)]

DAMN Damian, that was intense, however I couldn’t have put it better out there myself.

[Damian (Instructor)]

Totally agree!! I like.

[Damian (Instructor)]

You know Kirk, I tried being subtle and polite…but it doesn’t work and you do an incredible disservice by not doing so.

You have to hand it to Simon Cowell from America Idol. Cruel, maybe, abrupt, definitely, but wrong…rarely.

Here you have people trying to launch a professional singing career who have no business being in front of a microphone. Yet everyone close to them their entire lives have been telling them how awesome and talented they are. In turn that person has wasted time and in most cases money investing in their singing.

I only hope to save people a lot of time and BS. A lot of time, money and energy wasted listening to people I thought were experts.

The REAL DEALS never put themselves off as something they’re not. Good MMA, Wrestlers and Judoka are just that and don’t claim to be anything else.

[Damian (Instructor)]

Again, I agree. I’ve seen it with police work as well. I take my hat off for anyone who pursues a cop/firefighter/EMT career – or anything in those areas (corrections, medical, etc). But, there are people, who have a great heart, who are not cut out for that kind of work. It pains me to see someone who wants it, but just doesn’t get it & can’t have it. So, they must be let go. As much as people say “its a war out there,” it is still a “public service” job – not a “them vs us” job. So, yes, I believe honesty is the best policy – no matter how much it hurts.

Example: In 1992, I tried to become a DARE officer – work in a school. But, my instructor said no after the training saying it was not the place for me. I was hurt, but I pressed on. In 2002, I became a School Resource Officer (SRO) – an evolution of DARE. I was placed in a school – a middle school & alternative high school – I lasted ONE year. My DARE instructor was right – a school setting is NOT the place for me.

[Damian (Instructor)]

Kirk,

Great insight. You know you’re not always going to be great at everything you do and it usually comes down to the square peg, round hole problem.

There are some careers that I thought I should like that worked out OK, but really weren’t a great fit.

The example of being your wanting to be a DARE officer is an excellent one. I’m sure you could have continued on and provided a fine service without anyone noticing the difference. But, you had the insight to realize that this wasn’t what you thought it would be and pulled the plug on it.

Most people stick with something that they thought they should do and do it long enough until they hate their job and eventually their lives.

I always think of Miller’s “Death of a Salesman”.

[Author]

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