67 and never been in a fight - why do I need self defense?

I’m 67 and have never been in a fight…why do I need self defense?

I’m 67 and have never been in a fight…why do I need self defense?

Mr. Ross,

I am a 67 year old grandfather that hasn`t been in a altercation with a human since junior high school (although I came very close to punching the lights out a over zealous Mines Inspector several years ago).

I have not opened any of your elite program emails as I feel it is unethical to use the free trial information, when in reality, the chances of me actually doing the program are next to zero. 

Please excuse me from your offer, and let me know my subscription has been canceled.

I`d like to congratulate you on your program. I think it offers invaluable material for those that live in an environment where they may be threatened.

I apologize for the inconvenience I may have caused.

Thank you.

Tom O.”

Hi Tom, thank you for your consideration…

Your patronizing remark – “I`d like to congratulate you on your program. I think it offers invaluable material for those that live in an environment where they may be threatened.” tells a lot about you. 

Since you never looked at it, your compliment is disingenuous at best and proves you somewhat of a bullshitter. 

That being said…

I’m sure you have insurance –  auto, life and homeowners or renters.

How many times has your house burned to the ground?

Did you know that he chances of your home catching fire in your life is less than 1% (.08)

Yet the chance of you being a victim of a violent crime just this year is 2.1%  < That’s more than double.

Yet I bet you pay that insurance premium like clockwork!


Fact is, most people live free from violence…until they don’t. 

Tom, you’re like most people who think because you live and work in a safe neighborhood and avoid the “bad areas” you won’t ever have to defend yourself.” But we all know this isn’t true.

Unfortunately bad things still happen…just like house fires. Remember this Doctor’s Family that was bound, tortured and murdered in their upscale home?  (story here) Or these physicians who were killed during a robbery? (story here)

I still realize that this happening to you is REMOTE…but there’s still a chance.


But that’s not even what I’m talking about…

You mentioned a mine inspector situation…let me know if this sounds familiar…


TRUE STORY that happened just last night at my kid’s 7th grade basketball game.

Some parents on the other team were being LOUD and OBNOXIOUS. In fact, it got so bad that the ref ejected one of them in the first 3 minutes of the game – pathetic, but it happened.

Would you believe that it still didn’t stop the other guys…they just kept going and going. Ruining the night for the other parents and the kids who just wanted a good, competitive game.

They finally got SO LOUD, yelling about missed fouls and three second violations it had to stop.

That’s when walked over and politely asked them to please be quiet.

And they did – no big deal. The night went on (we won!) and everyone went home.

No one’s life was in danger and no one got attacked.

Now look, if I didn’t think I could handle myself, would I have had the courage to say something? No. I wouldn’t have. I would have probably sat there like everyone else and suffered in silence waiting for the game to end.

Fortunately…I ain’t goin’ out like that. 

Hey, do I feel fear…YES off course I do, but what I hate even more is bullies who think they can do what they want at the expense of others. If it went south it would have been dealt with, but I’m a nice guy and we all got along.

Most people think of “self defense” as defending yourself while being brutally attacked – but it’s so much more than that. It involves every form of bullying and harassment. 

Let me ask you…What would you have done Tom?

Five guys in their 40’s and 50’s being loud, aggressive and ruining the game for everyone involved.

I know what you would have done Tom…you would have sat there and suffered in silence until someone like me stood up for what’s right. 

Imagine if it were your grandkids Tom…WHAT EXAMPLE WOULD YOU HAVE SET FOR THEM?

What kind of MAN is their grandfather?


The fact that you didn’t even look at the material tells me what kind of man you are…you’re a sheep. 

Sheep don’t want to acknowledge violence exists in their lives. Sheep live in denial and denial is the biggest killer of them all.

Sure you haven’t been in a fist fight since middle school – but that doesn’t mean you’ve never been taken advantage of or bullied does it Tom?

Sounds like that Mine Inspector got the better of you…hell it’s seven years later and you’re still talking about it!

Look, I don’t know why you purchased anything without any intention of ever looking at it and pretending that by not looking at it you were doing the “right thing” is the most incredible justification for DENIAL I’ve heard in a long time.

You were never going to “punch that mine inspector in the face” because you simply lack the guts Tom. You’re like most men who talk a good game but don’t have the balls to stand up for what they believe in.

If you had the courage you would have taken a serious look at what you purchased. But you didn’t for the same reason people don’t like seeing police on the subways or the military at the airport – it’s a stark reminder that evil exists and bad things happen.

I know Tom, you’d rather not think about it.

You would rather ignore it and hope that nothing ever happens to you or your grandkids because we all know that as you get older, you become less likely to be targeted for a violent attack (that’s sarcasm).

Well speaking on behalf of the sheepdogs on the inside who have the brass cajones to do what’s right…THANK YOU.

Thank you for hedging your bet and hanging your well being on hope.

Because of sheep like you, the wolves will always eat. Your sacrifice actually makes our lives easier. After all, if everyone fought back, the wolves would have to get tougher, but they don’t have to since there will always be sheep like you to get slaughtered.


Personally, a life living in constant fear isn’t worth living.

Heck, my 80 year old mom has a real self defense plan when she’s babysitting my kids. 

I don’t know what compelled you to write me. Maybe you feel guilty about your decision to do NOTHING and were hoping I would understand.

Fact is I do understand…COMPLETELY. 

Tom, on behalf of my fellow sheepdogs, THANK YOU.

It’s sheep like you who keep the wolves fed.

Train Honestly,



PS. If you don’t want to be like Tom, take the next step with us and check out 60 Minute Self Defense HERE <<


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Join the Conversation


  1. I would love to train for an impending altercation. But I’m a stroke survivor! I have poor balance, and my right arm and hand are useless! I have to hold onto something to lift my leg up. I’m afraid if someone were to attack me, I’d be done for!

    1. Hi Mike,

      I hear you…but can you squeeze a spray bottle…or learn how to avoid a situation all together? If you can grip something you can use it to defend yourself.

      You need to STOP thinking of this stuff as martial arts and fighting…yes it’s a part of it, but only a third of it actually.

      I’m not going to bullshit you – the more physically challenged you are, the harder it is but…NOW YOU NEED TO BE MORE AWARE and MORE conscious of how you interact with your environment.

      We have people in wheelchairs figuring out how to protect themselves with the system.

      You need an attitude like F$CK YOU, I’m TAKING YOU WITH ME!!!!


    2. Michael Hesterberg

      Given your health conditions, I doubt you’re going to be a contender, but Damian’s stuff is the real deal, and it will definitely improve your chances in a scuffle. I’m way past prime, but I study the material. Hell, it may save me and someone else that I did not have to shoot because I was able to take care of the situation without having to go that far. My grandson is a black belt, but I tell him to look at this because if he is really in for a serious fight what Damian is teaching is the way to go.

  2. Easy Tough Guy!
    Allow me to respond to your assumptions.
    (1) The fact that I made the mistake on complimenting your program, was based on the many promotional video’s
    that you have sent out. In your mind, if that renders me a “Bullshitter”, I would have to say, That is your problem.
    (2) Insurance profile. Insurance companies are not in business because they are such nice people, they just want to
    help everyone. In my estimation, most insurance businesses are a racket. You almost need insurance to protect yourself from your insurance company.
    I buy minimal law required PL and PD. In other words I self insure. I feel there is much better value in being pro-active. For example put night switches on all trucks and equipment, and use them. Most shops burn down from a vehicle set ablaze from an electrical short. This can also prevent or deter theft.
    (3) Regarding your Wolf and Sheep analogy. Where I live we have real wolves, we saw 5 on the river last Friday.
    Lost a colt last spring. Your Self Defense program isn’t going to help that.
    Your “Sheep” remark.
    I believe and live the principle, If we see or come across a situation that isn’t right, It is our obligation to do something about it. I have spent too much of my life challenging in court and or negotiating with
    various government bureaucracies, redundant regulation and overzealous enforcement officers and their interpretation of regulations as opposed to the actual regulation.
    We have to choose our own battles. You look after the rowdy parents at the kids basketball game.
    I’ll do my part with what I encounter in business that affects the economy and ultimately everyone.
    To answer your main question, “Why did I write”… Self serving really, I didn’t want to be hooked into paying a lot of money for something I wouldn’t use. Like buying a book you never read.
    Thanks for cancelling my subscription.
    I can understand your disappointment in loosing a potential client. A small piece of advise… You won’t gain customers by insulting them.

  3. Tom,

    Your comments reflect the overriding attitude of the sheep…denial. Fact remains, bad things happens.

    And if you find much better value in being proactive…that’s EXACTLY what this is.

    Not everything can be settled in court and if you choose to live your life in denial, that’s your choice.

    Thanks again for your sacrifice.

  4. Hey Tom,

    It happens. A few weeks ago I go into the Alaska McDonald’s cause I’m walking, cold from the snow, and I want a coffee (and a terrible side salad). Minding my own business, looking out the window at the traffic. Dude in a santa hat walks in. Says something to me I didn’t hear, and I told him to check at counter. He asks me if I have any spare change, whatever. I said ‘sorry about that, no. Channeling his inner demon, he leans closer to me and snarls, ‘you better be’. I went to the counter took it out on ALL the McDonald’s staff. Manager comes out and kindly and slowly ushers the dude off the property, and probably back to the rescue mission down the street. I’m pushing 60, don’t have an aggressive bone in my body. If we would have gotten into it outside, I would have violently ushered him into an ambulance. I was still seeing red 2 days later. Dude must have sized me up from outside and figured what the hell.
    This is why I am an elite member. This is why I subscribe to the analogy of paying insurance. I did absolutely nothing but go about my business, and was almost involved in an altercation. I get just as much from the E-mails from Damian as the actual course material, which I haven’t looked at for weeks. And the material will still be there, waiting for me when I’m motivated to use it. Its real life, boots on the ground stuff, made for just such a situation as I was in. And no, Im not sucking up. Im just another elite member. Sorry for the long post.


  5. Mike, you’re a stroke survivor. Good, you survived! (Just like I did, along with cerebral palsy, spine surgery). Now, important question: when are you gonna go from a ‘survivor’ to a ‘prevailer’!
    Seriously Mike, SDTS is more than a self-defense; it’s a ‘head-thing,’ just like anything else! Are you enjoying what you’ve got left, or are you ‘feeling sorry for yourself’? Crucial difference here! I get up in the morning in my wheel-chair ready to grab the day by the throat! I can think, see the sun, read with one eye, enjoy the birds, my cat. Leave your pre-stroke days where it belongs- in the past! Be a hunter of life and don’ feel sorry for yourself! There’s too many able-bodied people like that- ‘victims,’ ‘snowflakes’. I’d rather enjoy being the wolf or the honey badger. Go to a wolf farm and study it. And suck it up!

  6. TOM

    After 36 years in Law Enforcement, I have seen things you have not. Now I teach people how not to become a victim. Before that can happen, the student has to agree that he/she does not want to become a victim to ANY wolf for ANY reason. We have a saying, “When seconds count the police are only minutes away.”

    I hope your world stays as safe as you want it to be. I will continue to help people be prepared.

    O. K. Neal

  7. I regret that we live in a world where sheepdogs are necessary. Damian has a good point: Do you have car insurance? Tom and many others hope for a peaceful life, me too! I studied Shaolin King fu for 50 years now. One proverb: “We train to fight so we may live in peace.” My buddy Teddy Roosevelt said it well: “Speak softly and carry a big stick.” We all avoid violence most of the time. No one wants it . . . except I am pursuing an EdD, and my dissertation topic is Minimizing Injuries Related to Interpersonal Violence. I want to keep people safe on our school campuses. But hope didn’t prevent the 104 school shootings since Columbine in 1999. None of us encourages violence, but STDS members are ready to deal with something we don’t want. Similar to having a AAA card or car insurance. Bernie McPherson, MSN.

      If you don’t understand, please look it up and post it on your mirror and fridge. L-5

  8. Damian, I agree completely. All my life, I have been big, fast, strong and effective in physical confrontations.

    I rarely had to use it, probably as the size and confidence were apparent. However, now I’m 62 with white hair. I’m slower and not as strong. I can’t help notice that predators look at me more like prey than they ever did.

    The methods and mindsets that you teach will fare me better now.

    Thanks, Bob

  9. In it something is. Many thanks for the help in this question.

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