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Top Five U.S. Presidents Who Could Kick A$$

Top Five U.S. Presidents Who Could Kick A$$

We give a Self Defense Company Salute to those Presidents
Who were Name Takers and Policy Makers.

5. John Quincy Adams

John Q. Adams

John was a real outdoorsman.

Adams exercised two to five hours a day, which was his way of “torturing himself for not being perfect.”He also soaked in ice baths, and “rubbed his body down with a horsehair mitten,” which is “painful as hell.”

Adams also bragged about having sex naked in zero-degree weather.

Any man willing to subject himself to that type of torture is going to be able to put foot to ass. You can assume that he’s going to punch directly through you, then punch through whatever ground you were standing on, then punch any memories of you out of existence, and then punch himself a few times for not beating you quite hard enough.

4. George Washington

George Washinton

Father of our country could beat you like a stepchild.

George Washington wasn’t simply the first president.  He was the first president/former wrestler. When Washington wasn’t busy kicking the British back to England, he would spend his downtime wrestling American troops. He once beat seven consecutive challengers from the Massachusetts Volunteers. He was also 47 years old at the time. No wonder he unanimously won the electoral college.

3. Abraham Lincoln

1865 Abraham Lincoln O 103c

He never told a lie…or lost a fight.

When most people hear about Abraham Lincoln, they think of him as the man who saved the Union or as a vampire hunter. But did you know he was also an amazing wrestler? When Lincoln lived in New Salem, Illinois, there was a gang known as The Clary’s Grove Boys led by Jack Armstrong.  The 6’4,” 185 lbs Lincoln didn’t like them too much. Armstrong and Lincoln decided to wrestle for supremacy. Lincoln grabbed Armstrong “by the throat, lifted him off his feet, shook him like a child and then tossed him until he surrendered.”

After Lincoln won, the rest of the gang tried to fight him. Lincoln offered to take them all on one at a time. Wisely, they backed away, because honest Abe would have destroyed them.

Years of log splitting made Lincoln’s strength a local legend; neighbors claimed he could lift thousand-pound boulders.

When opponents spoke badly of bills he proposed, our greatest orator and writer threatened to punch them in the face.

2. Theodore Roosevelt

Teddy Roosevelt

Bustin’ more than Trusts.

Before becoming the youngest president in U.S. History, Theodore Roosevelt spent time as a deputy sheriff in North Dakota (Not bad for a city slicker born in Manhattan).  Three outlaws thought they could get away with stealing deputy sheriff Roosevelt’s riverboat. They would have been better off taking Liam Neeson’s daughter.  Roosevelt pursued them for two weeks and got his boat back. After they were captured, Roosevelt kept guard over them for forty hours and kept himself awake by reading Tolstoy. Oh, Roosevelt also met and became friends with Seth Bullock while pursuing horse thieves. That’s right, the real Seth Bullock, sheriff of Deadwood, South Dakota.

Roosevelt was a sickly child so he spent his youth making his body strong, taking up — and excelling at — running, hunting, boxing and wrestling. He later grew to love Judo and even put a “Judo Room” in the White House.

Roosevelt believed that fearlessness was a state of mind. When a man in a saloon pulled two pistols on him, called him “Four Eyes” and ordered him to buy drinks, Roosevelt “gave the armed moron three quick punches to the face.

He kept a bear and a lion in the White House as pets and after a madman shot Roosevelt in the chest while he was en route to give a speech, he still went and spoke for an hour and a half, with the bleeding, undressed bullet hole in his chest.

1. Andrew Jackson

Andrew Jackson 1

King Kong got nothin’ on Andrew…I mean Mr. Jackson, I mean Mr. President.

Andrew Jackson was not the greatest president or the greatest guy, but there’s no denying that “Old Hickory” was one tough dude. As a colonial solider, Jackson was captured by the British at age 13. After sustaining a gash to the cheek for refusing to shine his captor’s shoes, he was forced to march shoeless, wound undressed, without food or water, for 40 miles while suffering from smallpox.

As an adult Jackson fought in several duels. One of the most famous duels was against Charles Dickinson, an expert marksman. Under the rules of dueling, Dickinson was allowed to fire first.  The bullet lodged in Jackson’s chest.  Jackson then steadied himself, took aim and killed Dickinson.  The bullet remained in his chest until his death many years later.  In fact, Jackson was wounded so much in duels that it was said he “rattled like a bag of marbles.” As if that wasn’t enough, he also invited the public to the White House for a party after he was elected and totally trashed the place. It was almost like 50 Cent was president.

Enjoy the holiday America!


Published by theselfdefenseco

Founder, The Self Defense Company

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5 Comments

  1. Hi Damien,

    as a member of your SDC Combatives I enjoy your emails and content, but as a person of Italian descent I can’t help but cringe every time I read praise of the racist Theodore Roosevelt.

    Few people know that the victims of the biggest mob lynchings in the US did not involve African-Americans but Chinese (1871) and Southern Italians (1891). The March 14, 1891, lynchings resulted in the murders of eleven Italian-Americans in New Orleans, Louisiana, for their alleged role in the murder of police chief David Hennessy – who by all accounts was a corrupt sleazeball and likely had a lot of enemies. The evidence against the Italians was farcical (some appear to have been arrested for no other reason than they were Italian and in the area at the time) and they were acquitted at trial. There was no evidence any of the men were mafiosi, as was widely claimed.

    Hatred against Italians in that era was widespread in the US, and much of the media coverage portrayed the lynchings as a great thing. Roosevelt shared this repugnant mentality. In a letter to his sister, he wrote:

    “Monday we dined at the Camerons; various dago diplomats were present, all much wrought up by the lynching of the Italians in New Orleans. Personally I think it rather a good thing, and said so.”

    See: https://www.theodorerooseveltcenter.org/Research/Digital-Library/Record/PrintFull?libID=o280928

    In another of his racist diatribes, Roosevelt claimed he was going to “show those Dagos that they will have to behave decently”. Italians, to him, were among the “wild and ignorant people” standing in the way of the “dominant world races.”

    See: https://books.google.com.au/books?id=CDt4iDHtJo4C&pg=PA12&lpg=PA12&dq=We+must+teach+those+dagoes+to+behave!+%2B+roosevelt&source=bl&ots=kM5GxfQQWt&sig=mTQYlVaEhPmO_MQM6QlVRmfZPVA&hl=en&sa=X&ved=0ahUKEwid1YTwm7bZAhUFUrwKHZyXBGYQ6AEINzAF#v=onepage&q=We%20must%20teach%20those%20dagoes%20to%20behave!%20%2B%20roosevelt&f=false

    Seems to me someone needed to show Theodore Roosevelt how to behave decently – he was a racist asshole. There are all sorts of racist thugs out there in terrific shape as a result of training, but whether they deserve to be held up as role models is highly questionable.

    I grew up in Australia where – during the 1970s, 1980s and early 1990s – a lot of Anglo-Australians felt it was their birthright to call those of us with olive skin and surnames ending in vowels such enchanting epithets as “dagoes”, “wogs” and “greaseballs.” It was one of the reasons I got into weight training and fight training, because looking like a “foreigner” made you a target (never mind that I was born in Australia). So it is invariably disappointing to read a piece praising the physical prowess of someone with such a repulsive disdain for Italians.

    Roosevelt was also not a fan of civil rights and, in an attempt to appeal to white voters in the South, ran a “Lily White” campaign that shunned black Republican candidates:

    https://blog.newspapers.library.in.gov/theodore-roosevelt-and-the-1912-campaign-a-complicated-candidacy/

    https://books.google.com.au/books?id=fixBOW3902UC&pg=PA74&dq=theodore+roosevelt+1912&hl=en&sa=X&redir_esc=y#v=onepage&q=theodore%20roosevelt%201912&f=false

    Roosevelt may have done judo, won a bar fight and turned the Whitehouse into something of a zoo by housing a lion, bear cub and numerous other animals, but he was still a racist. In this day and age, we can do much better when looking for masculine role models.

    1. Hi Anthony,

      Being Italian, I hear you…but a lot of people at the time were prejudice against Italians. So, in essence everyone was racist and bigoted…even Columbus.

      Does that mean we ignore the great things that he did or do we realize it’s a sign of those times and we’re grateful that we’ve come a long way.

      Let’s face it…every white man in the US government prior to 1970 was probably prejudice against Italians.

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