Fear is Good – The Self Defense Company

Fear is Good

Fear is Good


Fighting back is a scary proposition. Risking physical injury is unnerving at best and terrifying beyond comprehension at the worst. Getting punch in the ring is a lot different than going at it in the street against a violent criminal or rapist.

Stepping off into the abyss of real violence, the unknown of what is going to happen when you’re life is at risk should scare you shitless.  No sane person enjoys this feeling.

Yet some of us are willing to take that first step when we know that there are no other options.

You need to understand that the majority of people don’t have that capacity. In fact, they can’t even comprehend it. They’re sheep and they love telling you that if you fight back you will fail. It justifies their panic and inability to physically stand up to violence.

They will tell you the chances of your being attacked is remote. They will tell you that if you fight back the attack will be worse. They will tell you to “CALL FOR HELP”. They will tell you to run away.

Only there are times you can’t run, you can’t call for help and making a stand is your only option. I’m here today to tell you that they are WRONG and your desire to stand up to defend and protect is not only the right thing to do, but the odds are in your favor that you will be successful.

I’m also here to tell you that your concerns are real and justified because bad things happen to good people every day. The good news is that even a little preparation goes a long way. Even simply accepting the fact that you may be attacked is a huge step in the right direction. 

Wolves, Sheepdogs and Sheep

The wolves are criminals and  bullies who prey on the weak. They live lives without honor and aren’t even worthy of being considered animals. They’re rabid and need to be put down.

Sheepdogs are people who are good in nature and have the rare capacity to stand up to the wolves.

The sheep are the vast majority of society. They don’t have the capacity to fight back and can’t comprehend anyone doing it. They call you “crazy” or “stupid”. They criticize you. But that’s just their panic talking. The harder they argue, the more scared they are. Trying to explain your desire to defend and protect is like trying to explain algebra to a dog. 

The sheep deny that they will ever be attacked to justify their position of inaction. They think because they live in a nice area or send their kids to a good school that nothing will ever happen.

As you’re going to discover, this is not the case. The chances of you being attacked, raped, sexually assaulted are far greater than you think because the vast majority of assaults go unreported.

Make no mistake – everyone feels the same FEAR.

Fear is good. Fear is healthy. Fear means you’re not insane.

FEAR is your alarm system that prepares you for battle. It’s your way of recognizing danger and preparing for it. It doesn’t matter WHO YOU ARE – you feel fear.

The sheepdogs turn fear into action – and make no mistake THAT FIRST STEP IS THE HARDEST. What makes it easier is training. When you have a plan of action, you can take that first step and turn your fear into action. After that first step, the fear is gone and you’re in battle mode.

The sheep don’t have the capacity to take that step. They succumb to fear and let FEAR turn into PANIC.

Panic is useless. Panic is destructive. Panic will kill you.

The sheep are ruled by fear. They project their weakness on you – they attack your ability to defend yourself and deny your willingness to do so.

Sheep want to drag you down. Your failure makes the sheep happy with an “I told you so.” The sheep justify their NOT preparing by denying it will ever happen.

The sheep have taken over the asylum.

They’re all over media and education.

The sheep push the responsibility of resistance off on others when they encourage you to “CALL FOR HELP”. To depend on someone else for your safety – someone “qualified” and “trained”.

What if you can’t call for help? Most times you will be alone when you’re attacked and calling 9-1-1 is not an immediate option.

The sheep love to tell you how to live your life. Don’t go there after dark, walk with a friend, don’t wear that dress…and the list goes on. While this advice is fine, I would love, just once, for a talking head in the media or a police spokesperson to say “If you find yourself backed in a corner- FIGHT LIKE HELL!!! Kick ’em in the nuts, hit ’em with a rock and get the hell out of there.”

Wouldn’t that be GREAT!!! Just once I want someone in the media to tell you – “It’s OK to fight back.”

Because the odds are in your favor when you fight back.

Fighting back can be VERBAL or PHYSICAL.

According to the NCVS (National Crime Victimization Survey) Conducted by the Bureau of Justice Statistics

When you FIGHT BACK:

  • There is an 87% reduction in the probability of completed rape when women use any form of self-protective action.
  • Resistance is successful in stopping the initial assault in 42% of the cases.
  • In contrast, passive resistance (non-forceful physical and verbal resistance) was reported as unsuccessful (64.6% of 73 incidents) more frequently than as successful (12.3% of incidents).

The truth is here: if you fight back you the odds are in your favor.

We all have FEAR – learn how to use it to your advantage the way God and Nature intended.

Look, there’s no tough, just trained and untrained.

Don’t listen to the sheep – they don’t understand you and you’re not going to convince them to protect themselves. In fact, you need to thank them – the more sheep for the wolves, the less chance you will have to defend your self and your loved ones.

Train Honestly,



PS. If you think the chance of you being attacked or a victim of violence is unlikely, I have a couple of studies that say differently.

Study 1: 1 out of 5 women will be sexually assaulted (Reported by the NY Times Dec 14, 2011)

Study 2: 80% of the population over a 20 year period will be a victim of violent crime.(Victimization_Report)


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Published by Damian (Instructor)

Founder, The Self Defense Company

Join the Conversation


  1. Once again, very useful post. Like most people I was raised to be ‘nice,’ i.e., to develop a sheep mentality. I have spent much of my life developing the physical and mental skills to overcome that handicap. Your program helps.

  2. restif I hear you and I too was brought up in a stable home, with two living parents that couldn’t do enough for me. You can still be nice. I think a lot of people still mistake kindness for weakness and feel you need to act like some a$$hole to be tough. 

    I’m not suggesting you think that, I’m just thinking about the people that read this. The thing I think of…and it’s cliche. is Patrick Swayze in Roadhouse – yep, I went there. Be nice until it’s time to NOT BE NICE. 

    You have line when it’s crossed – you become the meanest SOB imaginable. 

    It’s like you’re the family guard dog. You play with the kids, they tug on your ears, roll around with you. But when that home invader kicks down the door, you turn into a holy terror.

  3. My reaction to invasion of my space is anger, not fear. By basic attitude is, “If I’m going, you’re coming with me.” I think that they can read that.

    When I was about 15 years old, I met my dad’s friend… a Marine hand-to-hand combat instructor. He was determined to teach me… and I learned, against my will because these were killing moves, but I learned. Fortunately, I have never had to actually use them.

    My first encounter was prior to self-locking doors. I had stopped at a red light in Venice, CA. Some idiot jerked my door open and tried to get in, telling me to move over. Like hell I will! I had seen a cop car about 7-8 blocks back, so I made a fast U-turn and floored it. He was trapped between me and the door, hanging on for dear life. When I came near the cop car, I slammed on my brakes and asked him if he would like assistance getting out. I was 20 years old then.

    My second encounter was in Hollywood, when I was about 22. I was window shopping and had stopped to look at a display. A man grabbed me from behind, pinning my arms. Ha! I was wearing stiletto heels and came down on his instep with my full body weight. It probably broke a few bones. He screamed and let go, but hadn’t moved back yet, so I back-fisted him and I think that I broke his nose… he was bleeding on my sweater! 

    After I was married, I started my son in Ishinru Karate and became a karate mom, five days a week, after school. The most important thing that I learned was to be aware of your surroundings at all times. Since I’m aware and walk with purpose, I haven’t had any more problems. I’m
    71-years old now.

  4. This post triggers emotional memories and sends shivers down my spine.  A perception of violent threat automatically produces either a “freeze, flight, or fight” response.  It is hard- wired into us.    Self-defense training, with repititious body movements  helps to prevent the “freeze” by building brain connections through the process of neuroplasticity, i.e. new pathways that prompt us into action without much or any thinking.   This works for young and old alike.    And, if “fleeing” is not possible in that moment,  I will remind you of a quote from Ed Parker, founder of American Kenpo:  “He who hesitates, meditates in a horizontal position.”  Think about it!

  5. I Agree Damian Ross. Fear is a Good thing, But never let fear turn into panic because when you panic it could get you killed. The Self Defense Company Training is Absolutely Worth Every Penny Spent.
    Thanks Damian Ross For You & All Your Instructors Do To Help All Of To Train & Learn The Self Defense Techniques that will help All of to Protect ourselves, Family, Friends & Our Communities To live much safer Lives. God Bless All Of You.
    Alex Storm ( alex5 ) ( storm2452 )

  6. True physiological fear is what has prepared us to defend ourselves from the beginning of time. Psychological fear or False Expectation Appearing Real is the paralyzing kind that prevents you from taking any action. And I agree there is trained and untrained. Simple as that. When they asked Anthony Di Salvo (The Boston Strangler) if he was successful with each victim that he chose he was very frank and said that if they fought back he let them go. So there are women who survived the Boston Strangler and dont even know it. Same thing for Ted Bundy. The one woman who fought back and escaped was instrumental in getting him caught.

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